Sharing in Spite of Fear

Although my hands weren't shaking, they might as well have been.  The butterflies in my stomach slowly started to calm.  I am embarrassed to even admit the reason for my nervousness.

I just had shared Christ with a coworker.

Don't get me wrong.  I have shared my faith plenty of times, but usually it was in the context of one of the following:

1. a mission trip
2. a church function
3. a religious conversation where the topic happened to come up

And although sharing our faith can involve overcoming some serious fear no matter what the context, this situation had my knees shaking.

I had been praying for "Amy" since she started working in the same office as me a few months prior.  I talked about church and tried to be the best example I could be, in the hopes a topic about God would come up.  I had tried to build a relationship with her, hoping that the better we got to know one another, the better opportunity I would have.  Interestingly, the more we worked together, the harder it became.

Yet lately God has been making me really uncomfortable with my laissez-faire attitude about sharing Christ.  Jesus didn't wait for opportunities.  He initiated conversations.  He didn't tell his disciples to be a good witness because they might be the only Bible some might read.  He told them to go and tell.

Yet this conviction didn't make all my fear disappear.  Recently I had to take my husband in for a surgical procedure.  True to my introvert nature, I just wanted to study for my next lesson I would be teaching at church and maybe read a magazine.  My plans did not involve being ready to share my faith with the hospital worker who wanted to small-talk.  Perfect opportunity.  And just like Jonah, I ran the other way.

After intense conviction over this lost opportunity, I repented and asked God to give me the opportunity to initiate a conversation with Amy, my coworker.  Still fearful, I was determined to obey this time.

Before heading to work this morning, I received a text that the other coworker who is in the office with Amy and me wouldn't be coming in.  I then realized that Amy and I would be alone in the office.  God brought to mind phrases from Ephesians 6 I had read this morning.  "Stand firm...with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace." "Pray that I may declare [the gospel] fearlessly."  And to top it all off, a song came on the radio at that moment with the words "Don't forget why you're here."

So at the first opportunity, butterflies and all, I shared with Amy.  She was receptive, and although she hasn't made a decision yet, I pray for her, that she will come to know Christ's saving grace.

And as the butterflies started to calm, I was at peace.  I obeyed.  I did my part.  Now it's the Holy Spirit's turn to do his. 

That is, until the next opportunity arises.